You Bunch of Muppets

Lock, Stock and all those other shite cockney gangster movies have a lot to answer for; not least the introduction of the word ‘muppet’ into every East End wideboy’s common vernacular. STT personally prefers the word ‘mug’ for pseudo-Del Boy posturing, but that’s beside the point because today it reached press attention that David Beckham has actually officially made the Hollywood big-time by hanging with the muppets. You know, the actual muppets: Kermit, the Cookie Monster and posse.

D. Beck’s quest for street respect has seen him talk slippers with Snoop Dogg and even talk to some actual latinos in LA, so it seems fitting that the Holy Trinity is completed with a guest appearance in the original hood, Sesame Street. The ex-England captain filmed an illustrious cameo alongside host Elmo, to introduce a new word to the fluffy red lothario and the millions of youngsters who watch at home. Renowned intellectual Beckham resisted the temptation to go for something humorous like ‘clitoris,’ and instead chose ‘persistence’ as his word of choice. Apparently the irony of Beckham teaching children vocabulary was lost on Americans.

An unknown source (suspected to be Count von Count) told us today: “David has always been a huge fan of the show. When he was a kid he watched it, like a lot of people, and knew all the characters. He was more than happy to go on. He loves dealing with kids and thought it would be a great way to get through to them. He has developed a great understanding speaking to children with his own boys and through his coaching at the Beckham soccer schools.” Beckham even chimed in with this lucid comment: “I had a great time filming it, a real laugh.”

Beckham now joins a long list of Hollywood luminaries who have appeared on the show, which has now broadcast more than 4000 episodes in close to 40 years on the air. The likes of Michael Stipe, Jamie Foxx and even Robert de Niro have all kicked it with Bert and Ernie in the past, so this was undoubtedly a shrewd move by D. Beck to raise his profile and show what a lovely chap he is. The show will be broadcast in a couple of weeks time Stateside but alas we won’t be getting the feed over here, as we have our own shit English version of the show, but you can rest assured that when shown, we will have a youtube link for you as soon as humanly possible. On an unrelated note, here is a random picture of Posh indulging Beckham’s muppet fetish by dressing up as Elmo. Apparently their collective excuse was ‘fashion.’