Snoop Dogg Lines up Doggystyle Three-quel

Still riding the success waves from his first and second forays into the world of adult entertainment, Snoop Dogg has today announced that the second follow-up to his 2001 masterpiece is in pre-production, with many WAGs likely to make the final cut should they sign on the dotted line.

Reportedly Snoop was eager to feature several English girls in the flick, tentatively titled Doggystyle 3, but was unable to find any girls shameless enough to take on his entourage of mid-level rappers and has-been American Football stars in the hardcore movie which aims to set new standards of, quote, “hip-hop sleaze.” Browsing last weekend’s News of the World however, the former Death Row rapper came across an exciting idea, and together with director Richard ‘Dick’ Ryder, started to chronicle all the kiss-and-tell hoochies in the newspaper’s archive.

STT would like to therefore congratulate some of these lucky girls who are now set to actually become ‘models,’ albeit not quite in the way that their parents would be proud of them for. Snoop insists that everything will be tastefully done, with him even making his own directorial debut behind the camera for some of the more avant garde scenes. He aims to truly capture the glamorous lifestyle of the footballer’s girlfriend, with scenes taking place in car back-seats, hotel toilets, alleyways and club VIP areas. Ever the romantic, Snoop also intends to stay true to his mantra of making his movies “as much for the honeys as for the gangstas,” thus subverting some elements of traditional footballer-WAG relations. Girls in Doggystyle 3 will therefore all be called by their actual names, undressed and subject to foreplay, and only two or three of the footballer’s friends will join in for the so-called money shot. Also, the usual exchange of money or gifts that usually occurs after the act has taken place will be glossed over, because as Snoop so accurately says “these girls ain’t hos.”

Worthy of particular comment from Snoop was Sarah Giggle, a lady that rose to fame recently after relations with Portsmouth hitman Jermain Defoe. He described the “professional” way she carried herself, and how little prompting she needed in the private rehearsal sessions that have been ongoing all week, even servicing the studio’s cleaner after Snoop joked that he was a famous producer Stateside. “As party girls go, she up there with the greats. I ain’t never seen so much go into something so little,” Snoop mused. “She got that ass too. The way the homies are hitting it, she ain’t walking out of here,” he added somewhat ominously.

Unfortunately none of the actresses were available for comment today, but with rumours of coverage from US scandal mag The National Enquirer, you can guarantee that the posh-frocks are already being lined up for the film’s premiere. So will any actual footballers be appearing in the title themselves? Ashley Cole was originally to be involved but as Snoop explains, he had to be cut at the last minute: “we had some great set ups for his (Cole’s) scene but we had to bring a replacement actor in. On camera it looked like someone throwing a hotdog down a hallway.”