30 October, 2007

John Arne Riise Needs To Gets Payed

In the bin man's grubby hand shown above is John Arne Riise's pay remittance, most likely from the red club in Liverpool. What can be concluded from this is that Riise lives in a house with a number, not a name and may be spending his lovely lolly on vice, rather than bricks and mortar. A googlemaps satellite image disproves this assumption and shows Cedar Close to be positively palatial.

click image to enlarge

Using cunning and guile, STT decided to follow suit and root around in Riise's bins. This is what was found:

1) A Viking helmet with big pointy horns
2) Ginger hair clippings, all mixed up with lint
3) Peter Crouch's fax machine
4) The skull of a vanquished foe, which has been poorly converted into a chalice
5) A right foot

6) A full Liverpool kit