23 October, 2008

African Football in non-Violence / Corruption / Death-related Story Shock

Firstly, thanks to the boys over at Unprofessional Foul for the tip-off on this one, as the mystery as to what Benjani Mwaruwaru has been up to since leaving Portsmouth gets cleared up a touch. You see, rather than get bogged down in the routine of playing football, he’s decided instead to cook up a nice little sex scandal, by coupling with the Zimbabwe Head of Soccer. Think not of some bearded posh man though, because THIS IS AFRICA, and as such, they appoint people like shapely Henrietta Rushwaya to posts of authority like this.

Ms Rushwaya allegedly overruled a long-standing team policy of a pre-match curfew for the players, so that she could bed the star striker, just hours before Zimbabwe were dumped out of World Cup qualifying in the first round. She is apparently in the habit of sanctioning such trysts, meeting Benjani anywhere and any time just to get some loving: “When (Benjani) comes home, especially on a siesta from his overseas club, he camps at Rushwaya’s residence where they live literary [sic] like husband and wife… Rushwaya herself is known for being generous with her body and numerous scribes have had a go. She is a very kind boss whose generosity has won her friends especially in the media as most of her scandals are deliberately swept under the carpet,” said the surprisingly Sun-esque anonymous tipster.

In a previous life, i.e. last year, Rushwaya was arrested and subsequently appeared in court on allegations of theft involving $2400. Dammit; so close to writing a whole article about African football without tarring it with the brush of criminality.

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