As you might have heard, The Manchester United Christmas party went off with a bang, as there were allegations of rape directed at Johnny Evans and various reports of lude behaviour. In recent weeks, Chelsea Players have also been accused of naughtiness and high jinx in the company of partially clothed ladies, while it was revealed that John Terry isn't actually a very good dancer.
To wash away the nasty taste that these stories leave in the palate, here is a selection of the finest costumes from this year's sport-themed West Ham party and last year's 80s-themed Liverpool party: (click on all pics to enlarge)
Luis Boa Morte dressed as a pixie? Oh no, he thinks he's a matador. Maybe Lee Bowyer was the bull.............
Pepe 'Pepys' Reina decided to go as a zombie. A lady zombie at that.
The ever-unpopular Carlton Cole reminds us more of Carlton Banks in his riding get-up, while Matthew Upson looks like he's at home in a scrum cap.
The legendary Rob Green.
Stevie Gerrard changed his all-weather-grade-6-all-over haircut for this punky number at Liverpool's bash last year. It's nice to know that the bloke's actually got a sense of humour.
Luis Garcia. Looks like Prince. P-I-M-P.
Pete Crouch. Looks Like Parrot. G-I-M-P.
Dean Ashton would gladly stamp on your head and drink Guiness for money. Are Ashton and Upson in the wrong game?
Freddie Ljungberg turned up to this year's West Ham party in an imported Samurai suit. Why? Because he can't hide that fellating midget of his in any other outfit.
James Collins + Drag = No one getting raped tonight.
Emmanuel Eboue's Tiger costume has yet to make an appearance during this party season. But don't worry - if it emerges, you'll be the first to know!
