Chanelle Cuddlestone

After several trials and tribulations with footballers over the last few months, it seems that Chanelle Hayes might finally have sealed a deal. So who’s the lucky guy then? Walking McDonalds advert Tom Huddlestone, the Spurs midfielder who’s showed plenty of promise but unfortunately failed to really establish himself as a regular of late. I think it’s safe to say that he’s one of the less glamorous footballers Chanelle could’ve gone for, but clearly everyone of higher stock had bigger fish to fry. He’s also not exactly, well, good looking in any way, and actually still pretty fat for a professional player. Reportedly Huddlestone has invited the Big Brother slag-bag to watch Tottenham’s final game of the season with Liverpool, and presumably study his bench-warming form in depth before deciding whether or not to get speed-banged by him. Well, cynicism aside, we wish the happy couple all the best in the future, sure this is a relationship that will run and run.

In other Chanelle based news, it seems that maybe Huddlestone might be barking up the wrong tree thinking she’ll be putting out much. According to this below video, her heart (read: loins) belong to someone else…or more accurately, something else. In a recently released saucy sex tape, Ms Hayes writhes around in climactic ecstasy before revealing the cause of her moaning to be none other than a puppet, albeit perhaps the famous puppet Flat Eric who shot to fame a few years ago as part of a Levi’s ad campaign. The quality is grainy and its difficult to work out with any certainty, but whoever the puppet is, he’s showing her a pretty damn good time. Whether Huddlestone can match this performance is up for debate, but was is clear is that without doubt Ms Hayes is a bit of a goer. The following video isn't necessarily pornographic, but does contain puppet sex.