I get the impression that playing for Manchester United kind of requires a sense of humour bypass these days. I don’t know why, but it just seems that they all take themselves way too seriously, even the usually reliable
Anyway, reports have reached STT HQ that this year’s event was one of the best ever, with the big egos of Ronaldo and Berbatov right in the firing line. An excitable source gushed: “The panto was in the form of an ITV News bulletin with Danny Welbeck posing as Sir Trevor McDonald.” Try and contain yourself folks because it gets much more hilarious from there. The man-on-the-inside continued: “The youth team guy playing Ronaldo was wearing a Real Madrid shirt with 123 Days To Go on the front – which is a reference to how long is it until the end of the season.” Comic genius! Ah, Swift must be rolling around his grave trying to sew his sides back together! Even Cristiano himself was tickled apparently: “The real Ronaldo was absolutely pissing himself laughing!”
Finally, and brace yourselves for a laughter explosion, “a coffin was wheeled in with a player dressed as Dracula with Berbatov 9 on his back – followed by someone as Wayne Rooney with a full on Bobby Charlton wig!” I think those two are maybe a little bit subtle for me, but kudos as ever for trying.
There we have it then folks: proof, if ever needed, that footballers are not very bright and not even remotely funny.