Having been threatened for the last couple of years, we now have on our hands an all-English final of the Champions League for the first time in history. Manchester United vs Chelsea in Moscow in three weeks time might not be the most enticing prospect for the neutral, but who can really argue that both sides don’t deserve it? Over the two legs, it was strangely Liverpool and Chelsea who provided the most entertainment, with two thrilling encounters that completely banish negative thoughts from years past of clashes between the two. Manchester United though were forced to adapt their naturally attacking instincts, and across the games showed a great maturity to snuff out Barcelona, who seemed bizarrely content to pretty much just play keep-ball for 180 minutes.
It’s at Old Trafford we start, and a deafening atmosphere that proved just how much getting to their first final in nine years meant to the United faithful. Having barely had a kick last week in the Nou Camp, and chasing shadows for much of the defeat to Chelsea at the weekend, the word was that United might be there for the taking should Barce score first. Again the Spanish giants dominated most of the possession, but still they failed to really carve out any clear-cut chances as the English champions mounted an epic 11-man rearguard stand. With Rooney and Vidic missing through injury, the team was not at full strength, but still Ferguson started with plenty of attacking options in Park, Nani, Ronaldo and Tevez, eager to make his intent known to the Catalans. The Reds almost made a nightmare start though when Scholes tripped Lionel Messi just inches outside the area, but thankfully German ref Herbert Fandel got the call right, awarding a free-kick, and resisting the temptation to gift Barce a dream opportunity from the penalty spot. United nerves were settled minutes later however, when Paul Scholes crashed a thunderous long-range strike past Victor Valdes in the 14th minute. Only his second goal of the season, the timing could not have been better for Scholes, who many will remember was robbed of an appearance nine years ago in United’s 1999 winning final due to suspension.
As in the Nou Camp, Messi was the real danger man for Barce throughout, darting around with such pose and intent, but once again, Evra played him with aplomb, and United keeper Edwin van der Sar was on fine form to deny his several pokes at goal. Deco too was excellent for the Spanish side, but twice he dragged decent shooting opportunities just wide as it started to look like another one of those nights for Barce. United created chances of their own though, with Park Ji-Sung sliding a precise effort just wide, and Nani, preferred to Ryan Giggs, wasting a chance to double their lead just three minutes before the interval when he glanced Park's cross. Perhaps the best chance of the game however fell to substitute Thierry Henry just after the hour-mark, who fluffed a point-blank header from Xavi's corner tamely straight at van der Sar. As ironies go, an Henry header at Old Trafford would’ve been almost too much to take for United, but thankfully the ex-Arsenal man failed to get any real power on the ball. Barcelona continued to play around United in the closing stages, showing delightful one-touch passing and movement, but ultimately they just could not break down the stern defence. Ferdinand and Brown were superb at the heart of that defence, but the most kudos have to go to Carlos Tevez who covered so much ground, both going forward and tracking back, that he must still be knackered today. And Ronaldo? Well, he was more of a team-player, but as last week in Spain, was pretty blunt as an attacking option. So, round one to Messi; let’s hope for football’s sake though that this isn’t the last time the two prodigal talents face off in this kind of arena.
We move to StamfordBridge then, and with Chelsea gifted a 95th minute equaliser last week at Anfield, the momentum was certainly with the home side. Never write off Liverpool in Europe though; when this competition reaches the business stages of the quarter-finals onwards, experience and history is worth so much. Liverpool undoubtedly played their part in what was an incredibly exciting rollercoaster of a game, with control lurching from one team to the other, but overall Chelsea just had too much for the Scousers, who have now been denied their third final in four years. From the outset, Chelsea were powerful and dangerous going forward, with Ballack dominating the midfield, and Drogba causing problems for the Liverpool back-line once again. The first chance fell to Fernando Torres however, who drove into the box and shot low after ten minutes, only to find Cech quickly out to smother the shot wide. Having been criticised by Rafa Benitez in the build-up to the game for his theatrics, of course the opening goal had to come from Didier Drogba, who finished off a great passage of play for the Blues just after the half-hour-mark. Lampard slid a delightful pass through to Soloman Kalou, and on a night where the young winger actually performed, he drove into the box with confidence and arced a shot towards Pepe Reina’s top left-hand corner. The effort was excellently parried by Reina, but it landed straight at the feet of the Ivory Coast international to hammer home, and the striker predictably celebrated by diving as a middle finger to Benitez and his other critics. Ballack then almost rounded off the half with a superb 25 yard free-kick that flew inches wide, but after the hairdryer treatment from Bentiez, Liverpool re-appeared a different side after the break.
They almost made a perfect start too, with Dirk Kuyt forcing a crucial save from Cech just minutes into the second half. Gerrard finally started to get a foot in the game, having broken the shackles of Claude Makelele somewhat after an anonymous first-half, and his passing opened the game up with Chelsea content to sit back. It’s always a dangerous game to play against a side such as Liverpool, and the Blues paid the price with twenty minutes to go when Yossi Benayoun (sledged throughout the game by a certain member of the STT editorial team) ghosted infield past three players to slide a ball into Torres on the edge of the box for the Spanish striker to fire past Petr Cech. Remarkably it was Liverpool's first goal at StamfordBridge in nine matches (841 minutes to be precise), and meant that the game was destined for extra-time, with few chances as normal time panned out.
Having been on the rack for almost 45 minutes straight, the full-time whistle was exactly what Chelsea needed, and throughout extra time both sides were crackling at their best. Both periods were bathed in controversy, and after less than five minutes, Chelsea thought they had got a vital goal lead when Essien drilled a shot past Reina, only for it to be ruled out for offside. It was the right call too, with substitute Anelka standing literally right in front of the Liverpool keeper, but any protests were muted a minute later when Sami Hyypia, on for much of the game for the injured Skyrtl, tripped Ballack in the box and a penalty was awarded. On his return to the side just six days after the death of his mother, Frank Lampard put the ball down, and as if there was ever any doubt, he lashed the ball into the back of the net to spark an emotional celebration. Lampard on the whole was more involved than I remember him in the last year or so, buoyed on the desire to dedicate at least one trophy this season to his mother’s memory, and for once he is worthy of the praise heaped on him by today’s press. Minutes later, just before the half-time break, Drogba doubled Chelsea’s lead as well as his own tally for the game, latching onto a pass after some decent work by Anelka down the right. He understandably went spastic as Stamford Bridge finally started to believe, but there was more to come in this game. Just after the break, Hyypia himself was probing in the Chelsea box to make amends for his earlier error, and having been tripped by Drogba after some nice footwork, he rightly appealed for a penalty. Italian ref Roberto Rosetti was having none of it though, despite looking like he initially pointed to the spot, and the game continued at a frantic pace. The decision to turn down Liverpool’s penalty was put into starker light just minutes later though when Ryan Babel unleashed a 35 yard wonder-strike past Cech to put the Scousers within touching distance of a remarkable equaliser, but it wasn’t to be. Over the two games Chelsea showed enough attacking intent to deserve the win, and are now in with a chance of becoming the first London club to lift Europe's most sought-after prize. Maybe then the Blues’ supporters will finally admit that Avram Grant isn’t a complete clown, but don’t bet on it.
We’ll see you in Moscow on May 21st for the titanic showdown.
the rock it to the bang bang boogie say up jumped the boogie
to the rhythm of the boogie, the beat
Inspired by some wonderfully conjecturous news this past weekend that Birmingham forward Mikael Forssell has a triple platinum hit to his name in his homeland of Finland, and may even pursue a career in rap music once his playing days are over, here STT has rounded up some of our favourite footballers-turned-rappers. Perhaps it’s that Christian holidays bring out the Brooklyn street hustler side in all of us, or perhaps it’s just incredibly amusing to see what happens when footballers’ egos are indulged to this extent, it’s hard to say…obviously audio/video included where available…
First up then it’s everyone’s favourite Chelsea striker Didier Drogba, who was apparently persuaded by good friend Nikolas Anelka that he really should bless the world with some of his prodigal MCing talent in 2005. The two of them teamed up with the apparently notorious Parisian rapper Doctor Gynaecologist (Doc Gyneco to his pals) to bang out a pretty budget charity single. And what was this ditty about you might ask? Judging by The Doc’s name you’d wager it was an explicit how-to guide for sleeping with tarts, but alas no; to use Didier’s own words, it was “just about going to school, trying to be a good person.” How boring. Drogba reportedly still records secretly for his own vaults under the name MC Drogbacite, but STT suggests that Did Droggy Drog might be better.
Perhaps closest to actually being rappers on our fine shores are the Fortune brothers, Jonathan (Charlton FC) and Clayton (Leyton Orient FC), who actually have as their cousin UK hip-hop/grime star Kano. Word on the street (i.e. Google) is that the three of them were all in a position to choose either career, yet while Jonathan and Clayton picked football, Kano apparently couldn’t be bothered with the training, so chose music instead. They have a few tracks floating around under the recording name of Family Business, but to be honest, they’re pretty embarrassing, even though by himself Kano has been known to leave the mic with third degree burns. On a slightly related note, the two Ferdinand brothers also claim to have been in a similar situation, but having chosen football, have thankfully promised to release some hard-hitting garage collaborations when they finish playing. Be afraid people, be very afraid.
Other notable contributions from this country include an absolutely tearing effort from Andrew ‘Don’t call me Andy’ Cole, working with producer The Pied Piper on a track ironically entitled Outstanding. Knowing that one tune wouldn’t be enough to satisfy the masses, Mr Cole had the sense to serve up three different mixes of Outstanding for us. Now the original’s obviously good; the Supakings Sucker-Punch mix is extra heavy; but personally it’s all about the Champions-Double-Treble mix, really goes off in a dance.
Back in his Portsmouth days, Lomana Tresor LuaLua was also known to bless the microphone on occasion, hosting down at several local nights under the clever alias of Dr Congo (he’s from the Democratic Republic of Congo, which is often shortened to DR Congo, so it’s like a play on words yeah, get me), but he’s got nothing on our English joker in the pack, Peter Crouch. Obviously famous for his robot dance, the Crouching Tiger also gets pon the m.i.c. whenever the national side gets together reportedly, but so far only this footage has surfaced so far. He might not have the looks of Ini Zamoze but at least he’s got the sense to instantly call for the rewind:
Turning to genuine rap success though we must of course direct our sights outside of the UK and towards the two largest rap markets in the world, France, and of course the good old United States of Freedom. It actually puts quite a smile on my face to see that Djibril Cisse has a rap album officially out in his native country, and unsurprisingly The DJ Inside Me has been flying off the shelves since its 2006 release. You can check some samples for yourself here, and honestly it really isn’t all that bad, despite being more Fat Man Scoop than Rakim. Describing his sound as ‘afro-beat’ might have sounded like a mis-step, but he’s pretty popular these days, even catching the attention of overweight has-been Fat Joe who deemed it necessary to pimp Cisse’s ride just last year.
The most genuinely respected rapper within the football world though has to be the American Fulham hitman Clint Dempsey, who records under the name Deuce. Hailing from a poor area of South-West Texas, Deuce grew up with a couple of rappers named Big Hawk and XO, both of whom he collaborated with on this actual US chart hit, Don’t Tread on This:
Lyrically it’s not exactly all that, and the weak football puns don’t help, but again it’s not really too bad considering the level of expectation. Used as a promotional tool by Nike to raise awareness of the US’s plight during the last World Cup, Deuce’s video was unfortunately tinged with tragedy as Big Hawk was clipped just after the song hit the airwaves, reportedly over a debt owed by his brother and not as a result of the song’s quality. R.I.P. Big Hawk, you have been missed, and unsurprisingly no witnesses have come forward. The game ain’t changed but shit just done got a whole lot more REAL, believe dat.
We leave you of course then with the jewel in the crown, and what you were all waiting for. Football has produced but one true rapping superstar, and having dropping a couple of teasingly big bars at the end of New Order’s hit World in Motion, it was with the infamous Anfield Rap that John Barnes really announced himself within the hip-hop community:
Providing the inspiration for, and definitely not shamelessly ripping off, LL Cool J’s classic old school jam Rock the Bells, Barnes sent shockwaves through the rap world that are still being felt today. Rumours that Dr Dre has had to scrap his planned comeback album Detox several times in the last few years due to hearing new Barnes material are yet to be officially confirmed, but reading between the lines, it’s pretty obvious. Barnes has been behind almost every crossover hip-hop hit in the last decade, managing, producing and writing for all the big hitters, while also providing them with the chronic connection, seen. Finally the truth came out earlier this year when having been repeatedly badgered as to who provided the complex ghost-writing behind his 2007 smash Smack Dat, Akon admitted at last that it was Barnes, and that he was back on the scene, ready to “rip shit up” to use his words…
With wild reports circulating yesterday of conspiracies and assassination attempts, STT has this morning come into contact with an unnamed source to shed light on Wednesday night’s laser incident. For those not in the know, Manchester United winger Cristiano Ronaldo was targeted by a green laser beam during the warm-up in Lyon, as well as during the first half of the Champions League tie, while UEFA officials scrambled through the crowd in a thrilling race against time to find the culprit.
This is not the first time this season a superstar has been targeted by laser however, as just before Christmas Didier Drogba received similar treatment during an away tie at Upton Park. As we speak, wild rumours are flying round Premier League dressing rooms of potential snipers looking to take out star players, while in certain circles, the possibility of aliens armed with actual laser guns like in Moonraker has also been raised. STT would like to condemn reports in the press simply dismissing both these incidents as just pikeys in the crowd waving about laser pointers, and suggest you join us as we delve even further beneath the surface.
Our source this morning showed us just how deep the rabbit’s hole goes, and I have to say, we were frankly baffled. Speaking exclusively to STT, our man described how the gradual softening of Premier League defences has meant that, in order to take out an opposing matchwinner, knee-high tackles from the likes of Neil Ruddock are no longer an option. Managers have therefore resorted to placing unemployed relatives of theirs in grounds throughout the country, to irritate players by blinding them with laser sights, but to date this has only been captured on film twice. As you can see from various STT Gameweek reviews of the past, on several occasions this season already, silenced shots have in fact been fired on players in opposition penalty area, by a weapon apparently so advanced that no wound is left behind.
There’s more though. One man is pulling the strings behind all of this, intent on neutralizing star players to the extent that their clubs no longer want them, and he is free to buy them for his own, ahem, personal use. Yes, our whistle-blower dropped a bomb (not to be confused with ‘da’ bomb) and revealed that DR EVIL has been behind this campaign of terror all along, with the sole intention of capturing enough world class players to have a cool 3-on-3 Scorpio match always running in the cage on his floating lair. Further suggestion that Dr Evil is also behind the plan to add a 39th Premier League to the season was raised, however, we have neither confirmation nor denial at this stage.
Alas however, there is no concrete evidence, and as no-one to date has been caught for questioning, once again this evil mastermind lives to die another day…
Another Tuesday and another cracking night for the three British clubs involved, with Rangers holding 2006 winners, and all round p.i.m.p.s, Barcelona 0-0 at home, while Arsenal and Manchester United scored for fun against Slavia Prague and Dynamo Kiev respectively.
Starting first out in the icy Ukraine, Man United got off to a flyer against the national champions and were 2-0 up within ten minutes. Things got interesting however when Kiev bagged a goal back not long after, due to some suspect marking from John O’Shea and some theatrics on the post from Ronaldo, but United were keen to push on. As the game developed Ronaldo became more and more involved, scoring United’s third with a sweet header before the break, and then notching up his team’s fourth from the penalty spot not long after halftime. Despite having a certain penalty denied themselves, Kiev were still eager to attack throughout the second half, and the useful Ismael Bangoura scored from distance with twenty minutes to play as they continued to press. On another night, it could’ve been 4-4 but United came away happy with another 3 points. Elsewhere in the group, Roma also continued to impress, beating Sorting Lisbon 2-1 in a hard fought tie in Italy. Mancini was tricky, and Totti a threat as ever, but it was substitute Mirko Vucinic who grabbed the winner twenty minutes from time for Spalletti's side.
Moving over to North London now, where Arsenal put on an unbelievable show, scoring 7 (seven) unanswered against an admittedly fairly weak Slavia Prague side. Still, you get the feeling that even against a Barcelona or a Milan, this kind of breathtaking performance would’ve been almost as dominant, such was the level of ability on display. As usual Fabregas was majestic, but special plaudits must go to Alexander Hleb and young Theo Woolcott who is finally starting to show he can handle life at this level. Every goal was beautiful, and at the final whistle, I think Prague were genuinely thrilled that they kept it under double figures. The other game in this group saw a resurgent Seville performing well against Steaua Bucharest, coming out on top 2-1 in a game that they were always in control of. Once more, Kanoute was on the scoresheet, but the real star of the show was Brazilian hitman Luis Fabiano who bagged his eighth goal in as many games for Spain’s third best team.
To Ibrox then, and Rangers’ continuation of their unbeaten start to the Champions League campaign against the orange-shirted Catalan giants. In a tight game, both teams had chances to win it, with Ronaldinho coming especially close from a freekick that had to be touched onto the bar by Allan McGregor. Little Leo Messi has criticized Rangers’ tactics of playing “anti-football” but to be honest, what did he expect? In the group’s other game, Lyon finally broke their duck against an awful looking Stuttgart side in Germany, coming out 2-0 winners, but is it already too late for the French champions?
Finally on Tuesday, in the “other” group (i.e. one of the two without British interest) Inter Milan were victorious in Russia against the mighty Sneeze Moscow, with Crespo expertly poaching the opener, while PSV hosted a 0-0 thriller against Fenerbahce. The highlight was genuinely STT favourite Deivid getting sent off for a pretty shocking two-footed lunge.
Moving onto Wednesday then, and not such a good night for our three representatives. While Chelsea earned a resilient 2-0 win against Schalke, Celtic (1-0 to Benfica) and Liverpool (2-1 to Besiktas) both suffered dehabilitating defeats on the road.
And its in Instanbul that we shall start, where another dismal performance from Rafa Benitez’s men leave them languishing at the bottom of their group with just one point on the board and everything to do in the remaining three matches. Biscuits are not exactly a great side but the Scousers just posed no threat and genuinely did not look like scoring from open play the whole game. Team morale was not helped by the farcical defending that led to game’s opener, with multiple ricochets wrong-footing Pepe Reina just 13 minutes in, but there was simply no urgency from the 2005 winners as the game slowly slipped away from them. Elsewhere in their group, Marseilles and Porto shared a point in France, leaving both sides fairly confident of qualification at the halfway stage.
To sunny Portugal then and a great game between Celtic and Benfica, both of whom will feel they had the chances to claim the points well before Oscar Cardozo stole in behind the Celtic backline to slot home with just three minutes left on the clock. Celtic keeper Artur Boruc produced several world class saves from Cardozo and the excellent Rui Costa but once more, concentration seemed to let down the Scottish club. Meanwhile in Milan, defending champions A.C. faced off against Shakhtar Donetsk's 100% record in the competition, eager to make amends for their defeat at CelticPark a fortnight ago.And make amends they did, running out 4-1 winners, buoyed by world-class performances from STT personal heroes Clarence Seedorf and Ricky Kaka’.
Over to West London next, where Chelsea finally established themselves in command of Group B after a relatively comfortable victory against a fairly uninspiring German side. An early howler from young keeper Manuel Neuer set the tone, as Malouda’s virtual backpass squirmed between his legs but overall Chelsea were decent, with Drogba putting himself in the shop window with a great attacking performance. Sad face for trying to bite Ronaldinho’s trick of passing off his back though, even Eider Gudjohnson was laughing at you Diddles and he likes everyone. The group’s other game saw a wonderful victory for Norwegian side Rosenborg against normally impressive Spanish outfit Valencia, winning 2-0 in the icy plains and keeping themselves as outside contenders for qualification.
And so finally to the other “other” group. A decent Werder Bremen side claimed a 2-1 victory over Lazio, inspired by pint-sized Brazilian whizzkid Diego, and it looks like they should have no problems making it into the knockout stages if they give a good performance in Italy in a fortnight’s time. Along with them I fully expect Real Madrid to go through as well. Despite going 2-1 down at home to the ten men of Olympiakos, the Spanish giants bounced back to finish 4-2 victors in a game that could’ve gone either way at the death. Robinho was excellent (big dance moves too!), but it was Iker Casillas’ late heroics which proved crucial in Madrid’s success, somehow clawing away a last minute header from Darko Kovacevic which would’ve made it 3-3.
Goal of the Round – Several of the Arsenal seven were just sublime team goals, that few other teams in the world could have produced but I’ve got to give this to Clarence Seedorf for his second against Olympiakos, perfectly volleying into the top corner over the stranded visiting keeper from 25 yards. Legend.
Player of the Round – Alexander Hleb, although you could just take your pick from the whole Arsenal midfield as they were all on song. Elsewhere, Kaka didn’t have a bad game for Milan either…
Surpirse Package of the Round – Rosenberg for putting the hotly tipped Valencia to the sword. The Norwegians had gone six years without winning on home turf in the group phase, but had too much for the rather lacklustre looking Spaniards.
Happy Monday everyone, and after the exciting international break we are pleased to be back down to regular business. Firstly though, a shout out to the England squad and backroom staff, nobody can really argue with two 3-0 scorelines, even me. Secondly, also a massive big up to everyone involved in Scotland’s glorious win over France midweek, any victory over the French is surely a victory for football in general. Anyways, another interesting weekend, with two of the big 4 held to goalless draws, and Man City further solidifying their place as serious contenders as they sit second in the league table. In other news, this season’s first North London derby saw a comprehensive victory for Arsene Wenger’s kids, heaping even more pressure onto the strained looking Martin Jol. Its ok Martin, we still like you, just go chill out with a smoke and a pancake and everything with sort itself out soon!
Premier League Team of the Week (based on OPTA stats, Fantasypremierleague.com ratings and my own expert eye):
Keeper – Brad Friedel (several world class saves from the ever-impressive Yank)
Defence – Glen Johnson (handled the very differing threats of Crouch and Torres well), Jaime Carragher (immense as ever), Leighton Baines (impressive both in defence and attack), Danny Higginbotham (confident transition back into the top flight)
Midfield – Cesc Fabregas (ran the game and notched up his fifth goal of the season already), Sebastien Larsson (excellent general play and top drawer set-piece delivery), Papa Bouba Diop (strong and positive throughout), Martin Petrov (Michael Johnson may get all the plaudits but it was Petrov who was behind everything City created)
Up Top – Emmanuel Adebayor (fantastic all round performance, topped off with an early contender for goal of the season), Kenwyne Jones (involved in every attack and caused real problems for an already ragged-looking Reading)
Weekly Awards:
Nutmeg of the Week – Arbeloa getting Benjani with a timely back-heel
Goal of the Week – Adebayor’s cracker of a second goal; sweet first touch to tee it up and then his inordinantly long right leg did the rest Save of the Week – Dynamite penalty save by Pepe Reina from a rather casual looking Kanu, who was otherwise excellent
Skill of the Week – Didier Drogba's attire on the sideline was sublime. He neatly rounded off a cream blazer with a back to front New-Kids-On-The-Block style cap. Jackass.
Nearest Lampard came to Contributing…er, of the Week – Another big performance by Frank, marshaled the midfield to a thrilling scoreless draw at home to Blackburn. What would they do without him? Additional kudos for still having the appetite for the club game after the pressures of two crucial England performances in a week
Wrestling Move of the Week – Papa Bouba Diop unleashing a running clothesline into Benayoun’s face
UFC Move of the Week – Shevchenko delivers a perfect T.K.O. kick to the head of Samba
Can-We-Have-Our-Money-Back Moment of the Week – £16.5 million pound Darren Bent jogs on with Tottenham 2 – 1 down at home to Arsenal, what better way to win over the home fans than with a goal? Ball drops to him on the edge of the box, no defenders in sight…slices it off for a throw-in. Nice one.
‘Try Saving’ tackle of the Week – Toure spreads his legs (easy now) to prevent Berbatov putting Spurs 2 – 0 ahead, after the Bulgarian had already rounded the suspect Almunia
Blow for England of the Week – Heskey limps off early with a suspected broken toe (never thought I’d genuinely consider the loss of Heskey detrimental to anything but how times have changed)
Best Advert Slogan That Sounds Like a Porno…of the Week – Nike’s new phenomenally titled “Put it where you want it” tour. I’m not gonna say anything, it’s just too easy
Whinge of the Week – Mourinho throwing a TV monitor in the general direction of the fourth official after Kalou was given offside from Belleti’s cross, even though he was actually behind the Brazilian full-back when the ball was played. Interesting. Here’s Jose to clarify: “I could feel immediately the movement, somebody that understands the game and feels the football, smells the situation…it was easy to see, it was obvious.” Er, what?
Quote of the Week – “The team with the best players tends to do the best.” Good to see that years of inexplicable hyperbole haven’t blunted Andy Gray’s powers of deduction.
Hero of the Week – Got to be Dean Ashton for bagging his goal since the FA Cup Final 2006, well done fella, nice to have you back amongst the goals. What is with the haircut though, did you lose a bet? Zero of the Week – A few candidates for this one but I think it might have to be Shevchenko for yet another apparently clueless performance. It’s almost like he’s been possessed because he seems to have literally no memory of how to even run, let alone kick a ball. Either that or he’s laughing all the way to the bank at the ridiculous wages Abramovich is prepared to give him.
Personal Highlight of the Week – Seeing an old-fashioned contested drop-ball in the Portsmouth match, and would you look at that, no-one got their legs broken or their eyes gauged out. Can we have more of them again please?
